Chapter 3: A well deserved rest

I decided to take a well deserved break after the "alligator incident", so I went where I always go when I need a break: sunset spas in east LA. When I got there I noticed phillipe in the corner; his tan, wet skin reminded me of the luxury tooled leather seats standard in any King Ranch© F-series© pickup. I slipped out of my muddy clothes, and into the steaming hot spa, all 8 jets roaring like the cylinders in a bored out Windsor v8.

Phillipe came in with nothing but a short towel on, sliding slowly across the floor.

"Why hello there mike, shall I join you?" He purred.
"Don't make me get on my knees like a gm executive begging for money" I replied.

Phillipe started across the floor, but his foot caught on a bar of soap on the floor and he came crashing down, cracking his head open on the door jam. Blood gurgled from his mouth as he tried to form words for a few seconds, but soon he was completely silent, like the electric motor on a Ford Escape© Hybrid. While understandably upset by phillipes accident, I finished up my steaming, and ran out to the parking lot, anxious to get back home, enjoying the ride in my diesel f350© Superduty© Powerstroke©.

As I scampered out the door, I thought about phillipes bleeding, decaying body in the now locked steam room (I had nothing to do with it, but I thought it best if I took the only key), but was soon distracted by thoughts of the 2010 Flex© Hybrid.

Chapter 2:Slippery, Green and Wet

It was a hot georgia day when I arrived at the alligator farm. Burt greeted me at the entrance, and all I could think about as I gazed at his muscular, sweat covered calves was how much more comfortable we would both be if we were in the back of any of fords extensive line of luxury SUV's and minivans, from the huge, rugged Ford Explorer © to the sleek, comfortable Windstar ©. We both climbed down into the gooey mudpit and looked for our first target.

After a short time of looking, we found one strong crocodile, nicknamed "Daisy" by the locals. When I saw that muscular, strong tail slap burt away, all I could think about was the best in class Ford F-150© pounding through any of it's obstacles on the road as if they were houseflies. The elegance of his simple yet destructive jaws snapping on Burt's left arm reminded me of what any great Ford F-150© truck does to the environment on a daily basis.

Before long the crocodile had finished with Burt and was moving on to my camera op, Patrick. His screams for help did nothing but to wisk me back into daydreaming about the powerful surround sound speaker setup available on any ford SUV,sedan, or truck. His blood flowing freely through the water reminded me that I had left my classic sunburst red Ford F-250 superduty out in the rain by itself, so I hurried away from the job site, yelling back to the only remaining member of my crew "We'll fix it in post!"

Chapter 1: A REALLY Dirty Job.

Episode 1: A "REALLY Dirty Job"

I got to the job site around 6 am, I could see that many of the burly, muscular men were already there. Phil, the guy I was "Introduced to" last night was there, and he quickly ran over to see if I "Needed anything". His muscular, shining calves running in the wind did nothing but remind me of the durable yet sleek finish available on any of the newest line of Ford Superduty © trucks, tough yet elegant.

My vision wandered a little farther, and I could see the low waistline on his denim jeans: criss-crossing, durable, thick fabric, reminiscent of the supersized leafsprings on the ford f-450. He bobbed up and down like the powerful shocks on a Ford pickup, only stopping to kick away the occasional rock on his fast trot towards me.

He finally got over and skidded to a stop, leaving a long line in the loose gravel. "He really could use a pair of over-sized disc brakes, like available on any quality built american ford truck" I thought to myself, as he waited eagerly to "Talk".

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More next week!